Clay Aiken is looking back at one of the most difficult periods of his life, nearly 20 years after a daytime television controversy unexpectedly exposed a deeply personal part of his life before he was ready to discuss it publicly.
The 47-year-old “American Idol” alum recently revisited the 2006 incident, explaining that Rosie O’Donnell effectively outed him during a heated discussion on “The View.” Aiken was not publicly open about his sexuality at the time.
The controversy actually began on “Live with Regis and Kelly.” Aiken was filling in for Regis Philbin when he jokingly placed his hand over Kelly Ripa’s mouth while trying to speak during a segment.
Ripa quickly moved his hand away and made a remark about not knowing where his hand had been. What initially appeared to be an awkward television moment soon developed into a much larger public controversy.
Days later, O’Donnell discussed the exchange on “The View.” While defending Aiken, she described Ripa’s remark as homophobic and spoke about the situation from her own perspective as a gay person.
For Aiken, there was an enormous problem with that defense: he had never publicly said he was gay. He has since explained that while some people close to him knew, other members of his family—including his grandparents—did not.
Aiken was in Los Angeles when the “View” discussion aired. His longtime friend Jaymes Foster woke him and told him what had happened. Aiken remembered immediately becoming frightened as he realized his private life had suddenly become part of a national television debate.
Looking back now, Aiken described the emotional impact in painful terms, saying he “died inside” during that week. In another recent discussion about the controversy, he characterized it as perhaps the most catastrophic week of his life.
Despite how painful the experience was, Aiken does not blame O’Donnell or believe she deliberately tried to hurt him. He said she meant well and believes her comments came during the heat of an increasingly tense live discussion with Ripa.
Ripa also strongly rejected the suggestion that her original remark was homophobic. At the time, she explained that Aiken had been shaking hands with audience members during cold and flu season and said her reaction was about hygiene rather than his sexuality.
Aiken eventually chose to come out publicly on his own terms in 2008, appearing on a magazine cover with his newborn son. He explained that becoming a father influenced his decision because he did not want to raise his child while feeling that he himself was hiding an important part of his life.
Almost two decades later, Aiken says the 2006 controversy rarely occupies his thoughts, although renewed questions have recently brought those memories back. He can now recognize that O’Donnell was attempting to defend him while still acknowledging how painful it was to have such personal information revealed before he had chosen when and how to share it.
